Children's TV presenter Sarah-Jane Honeywell has spoken out about her devastation over losing her Cbeebies job when she posed for nude photographs.
The TV and radio personality, now 50, worked for the BBC children's channel when she agreed to a PETA campaign which involved her posing nearly-naked.
The 2011 photographs showed her lying in a pair of nude knickers with her hands covering her modesty, while lying on a plate of food in London's Trafalgar Square.
However, the charity campaign sent her world crashing down around her, as she revealed she was suicidal and facing £100,00 of debt.
Speaking about the ordeal to The Sun's Fabulous magazine, Sarah-Jane said: 'I felt like I'd let my husband down. I'd let my parents down. I'd let everybody down.
Children's TV presenter Sarah-Jane Honeywell has spoken out about her devastation over losing her Cbeebies job when she posed for nude photographs
The TV and radio personality, now 50, worked for the BBC children's channel when she agreed to a PETA campaign which involved her posing nearly-naked
'I walked to the train station in Liverpool and, I hadn't thought I was going to kill or hurt myself, but it was like a compulsion.
'It was like, 'I need to jump'. And then I remember my little boy kicking and that shocked me out of it.
Sarah-Jane is mother to her two children, Indiana, six, and Phoenix, eight, with her husband Ayden Callaghan, who previously starred in Hollyoaks.
She got the job aged 29 in 2001 and was earning around £300 per episode.
Sarah-Jane clicked with her co-star Justin Fletcher, who played Mr Tumble, however she claimed he ghosted her once the photos were released.
The former kid's TV star admitted she was shocked by the strict regulation on the channel, as she was once scolded for getting a tattoo of fairy wings on her back.
Sarah-Jane described having to be 'squeaky, squeaky clean'.
However, she insisted she didn't think the racy snaps for PETA would be a problem and she claimed they originally told her she would be wearing underwear.
The 2011 photographs showed her lying in a pair of nude knickers with her hands covering her modesty, while lying on a plate of food in London's Trafalgar Square
However, the charity campaign sent her world crashing down around her, as she revealed she was suicidal and facing £100,00 of debt (pictured 2018)
But when she got into position they told her going nude would grab more headlines and she agreed because it was for a good cause.
Although her opinion changed when the photos were released and she recalls 'her legs almost going from underneath her' when she saw the coverage.
Sarah-Jane recalled calling Justin because she had a bad feeling but said that she never heard from him of any of the other Cbeebies stars again.
She said that she discovered through a newspaper article that the BBC had said she no longer worked on the channel.
The backlash she received was massive and someone even set up a 'I Hate Sarah-Jane Honeywell' Facebook group to troll her.
In the coming years, Sarah said her work offers dried up and she struggled to pay her debts, by March 2015 she had hit rock bottom and wanted to end her life.
However after feeling her unborn baby, Phoenix, kick she was given hope for the future and named him because he 'rose from the ashes'.
In September last year, Sarah-Jane admitted she is still 'constantly mum-shamed' after being sacked over the topless snap.
Speaking in an interview with The Sun, the TV personality explained how she still faces backlash and even experienced 'uproar' over a recent holiday photo.
In September last year, Sarah-Jane admitted she is still 'constantly mum-shamed' after being sacked over the topless snap (pictured on Tikkabilla in 2002)
Drama: Speaking in a new interview with The Sun, the TV personality explained how she still faces backlash and even experienced 'uproar' over a recent holiday photo (pictured)
Sarah-Jane said: 'I am constantly mum-shamed, I've come to expect it. But I certainly wasn't expecting such an uproar when I shared my snaps from our recent holiday to Spain.'
She said: 'I had let my CBoobies out on a beach in La Manga and I posted a photo of myself topless on Instagram.
'It was just the silhouette of my body and then another taken from behind - people were outraged. My comments section was flooded with strangers concerned about my 'poor boys.'
Sarah-Jane admitted she also lied about ever having taken illegal drugs when she was asked during a medical at the BBC.
The star had previously dabbled with cocaine and pills but feared being honest would cost her the job.
Sarah-Jane said she also struggled to get on with some of her behind the scenes colleagues and even recalled one incident where a co-worker told her she looked 'old and ugly' and that her hair was too long.
While she now works on BBC Radio Lincoln presenting a Sunday afternoon show, she still has a sour taste left in her mouth over her time with CBeebies and doesn't let her sons watch the channel.
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